Changes of Circumstance

I've written on here a lot about how important it is to me that people care about me. Things with the important people I work with have been really haywire lately. It's hard to realize that people really do care, everyone is just in their own world. I have clients that I have to care for- and doing a semi decent job of that is helping me to get through. There a changes in my schedule, in how I am perceiving things. It's like being on the subway, rushing through a tunnel. Some things move and some things don't move. Passengers and poles stay steady while the tunnel outside is a blur too dangerous to enter becuase of the speed of the train. The passengers would be my goals for next year, the poles the values that I will need to accomplish them. The speed of the train in it's liminal-like form are the changes of circumstance that I will encounter. I like that speed when it is on a real subway, it exhilirates me. I pray for my inner turtle-like spirit to begin to like that speed as it relates to changes in my life. I want to be a hero in a John Cheever story, traveling on a subway to some metaphorical shimmering of gold, to some Spring day in Central Park that ends with a beautiful subway ride home.